Embracing the Journey Inward
Happy Sunday, my lovelies!
So much of the reason that keeps people from approaching art or creating is the fact that when one stares at a blank canvas, they are staring at themselves. It’s like an empty hole waiting to be filled with you…and you think, who am I? And what do I have to offer?
It’s the scariest, most vulnerable place…trust me – I’ve been there long enough to know that no matter how much I might enjoy the process, there are also really hard days in which I hate everything about what I see. And I’ve come to realize that I am inevitably hating what I see of myself. The inward parts, the ugly parts, the parts of myself that are harder to accept.
Painting is where I go to combat shame. It’s where I come face to face with my truest self, in order to truly face myself. It’s so hard not to judge the marks, the color choices, or to walk away from this intuitive process altogether and just make pretty wall art.
The struggle is real. And as always, the struggle is to love and accept myself just as I am. To embrace all the uniqueness of my journey, especially the healing that indubitably happens as a result.
We are all creative beings. We might not be painters, poets, or singers. But we are each born with a unique ‘thing’ that we do well, and that no one else can duplicate. It makes me sad to see people who do not honor the creativity, yet constantly express to me or anyone listening that they wish they were creative or that they just don’t have time for art. Someone recently literally told me she just “has no vision, and that everything she tries to paint looks ugly.” And though it was not the proper place or time, what I really wanted to ask her was “What is it that you wish was different about yourself? What is it about letting go and trusting your inner artist that scares you?”
What I love so much about the intuitive painting process is that every time I show up, I’m truly embracing myself. I’m embracing my journey in Faith. I’m grappling with all the scars, the wounds, the bruises, and the stories that shape me as the artist healer I was born to be.
Where are you embracing your journey, or yourself, in faith right now? ?